Ronald Reagan deserves posterity’s honor, and so it makes sense that the capital’s airport and a major building there are named for him.Ronald Reagan fired all of the air traffic controllers for striking, and so it makes sense that the capital's airport is named after him as a reminder to stay the fuck in line.
The article goes on to talk about what a great man Ulysses S. Grant was. Something to do with being born to "humble circumstances" and "swift and forceful action to restore order and legitimate government" and I'm sure Blacks everywhere should be happy just to shine his shoes, because even though "not himself an abolitionist, he recognized from the very start that the Civil War would cause, as he wrote, 'the doom of slavery.'" So really the jokes come fast and furious. Try not to laugh too hard because you might miss some.