This isn't scary

I'll give it hilarious, I'll give it bizarre, I'll give it potentially fascinating if you're into that kind of thing, but it is not scary.

Canadian authorities are investigating an "unbelievable" incident in which a passenger boarded an Air Canada flight disguised as an elderly man, according to a confidential alert obtained by CNN.

The incident occurred on October 29 on Air Canada flight AC018 to Vancouver originating in Hong Kong. An intelligence alert from the Canada Border Services Agency describes the incident as an "unbelievable case of concealment."

So we've already got the thrillingly terrifying buzzwords incident, intelligence alert, and concealment; the article soon cycles through impostor, subject, approached, flight originating from, under investigation, and many more.

And I'm like, OK, I'm definitely interested that this appears to have been his way of fleeing a bad situation, as the article says he tried to claim refugee status. But let's calm down, people.

If this man was interested in blowing up a plane (let's say), he could have done it equally well in his old white man disguise or while reverted back to his natural form as a glossy-lipped Asian twink, and it makes no difference in which form he boarded the plane. Identity checks on flights do nothing for so-called "security." The explosives strapped to your chest don't care if the name on your passport matches the name on your ticket or, for that matter, if the face on your passport matches the face on your face.

If this is a story, it's a story about a man in a hilarious costume and in a probably less hilarious personal situation, nothing more. It is not frickin' scary.